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Step-by-step guideTotal time: 5 min5 steps

How to Start a Great First Chat After Matching: 5 Golden Rules

The first message after a match sets the tone. How to open a conversation that the other person actually wants to answer.

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  1. Step 1

    Reference the Questions

    By the time you match, one of you has already answered the other's questions. Start from those answers instead of a blank greeting.

  2. Step 2

    Avoid Generic Messages

    Generic messages like 'Hi' or 'How are you?' don't get anyone's attention. Comment on a specific detail from the profile instead.

  3. Step 3

    Ask Open-Ended Questions

    'Yes/no' questions kill the conversation. Ask open-ended questions instead, like 'What do you actually think about…?'

  4. Step 4

    Be Authentic

    Don't play a part. Be natural, sincere and genuine, and let the other person get to know the real you.

  5. Step 5

    Suggest Meeting

    Suggest meeting after a few days of chatting. The longer it stays in text, the less likely the meeting becomes.

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